How to Build Resilience When Life Seems Impossible

People of all ages face challenges especially when it comes to resilience. Often challenges feel insurmountable. Being a high school/middle school teacher, I work with teenagers who are going through radical transformations in their lives: puberty, relationships with parents and friends, dating, etc.

Just look at your old middle school yearbook and tell me it wasn’t awkward. Be honest, no one was cool back then.

How to Build Resilience When Life Seems Impossible
Photo Courtesy of limaoscarjuliet CC BY

I see my own children struggle to push through challenges when things get tough. I can’t even fathom the difficulties some people face.

Through focusing on building resilience and creating the ability to “bounce back,” obstacles, challenges, and fear can be overcome.

Below are three practical habits you can use today to build more resilience.

1. Build Caring Relationships

Making connections and committing to relationships with people is important. It’s probably the most important thing you’ll do in life.

Finding common ground and having a network of friends keeps us grounded and focuses our priorities.  Our community provides a sense of place and belonging.

We can see our strengths and work beside others to accomplish goals.  We build and receive empathy when we focus on the needs of others. Plus, it is always nice to have people to simply play with.

Look to your family and friends as your support system. Talk to your spouse openly. Show (don’t just tell) your kids how much you love them.

2. Change Your Response

So often, attitude is the only factor standing in the way of our happiness and success. Begin to frame your challenges as problems to be solved.  Every problem has a solution. By framing obstacles as problems, you provide yourself an opportunity to be the hero and build success.

Next time you come home upset from a hard day at work and you son asks to you to listen to his story about how he was on the swing at recess, pause, breathe, and take the time to be present with your child.

This simple change in response will make the cares of work wash away while bringing you closer to your kids.

[shareable cite=”Robby Miles”] Frame your challenges as problems to be solved.[/shareable]

3. Keep Things In Perspective

“How bad is it really?”  I once heard a story from an Orthodox Priest and Counselor where he asked people three tough questions.

  1. What is the worst possible thing you can imagine happening to you?
  2. What is the best possible thing you can imagine happening to you?
  3. Where does your current problem fall on the scale between those two extremes?

Imagine thinking about your day to day problems with this type of perspective. How would it change the severity or your problems? Certainly what we deal with day-to-day really isn’t as bad as it could be.

This week I challenge you to work these three habits into your schedule. Set a reminder on your phone several times per day with a note to help.

[reminder]Which of these 3 habits could have the biggest impact on your life?[/reminder]

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About the Author

Robby helps busy business owners simplify and automate their productivity systems so they have more time to focus on what they're best at. He helps you design and implement plans and systems so you can work ON your business, not IN your business. Companies such as Productive Magazine, Nozbe, Matt McWilliams, and Notable Themes have trusted Robby to share his productivity systems, increase sales, and create a better customer experience.